I needed to go to the grocery store for some reason the other day and as I walk in it looks like the store threw up red, white, and pink. Chocolates, red heart shaped balloons, stuffed animals, and flowers galore. Not the first thing a single lady wants to be reminded of right? So I walk in rolling my eyes trying to push that feeling of disappointment that yet again one more year is passing me by without a man for Valentine’s Day. Yes it is the one day a year where we get reminded over and over again as we see women all around receive their roses and chocolates and hear their romantic plans for this one special night. You try to act happy as you listen with a smile plastered on your face all while you are just telling yourself, well I will be sitting on the couch in my pajamas with a pint of ice cream in my lap and how sad is that. You then start to feel down about yourself and asking what is wrong with you because that special someone has not whisked you away. Have you ever felt that way? I know I have, but over the last few years I have started to change my thinking.
I am about to spin things around and turn our negative thoughts into positive thoughts and show you how special you are to God and how awesome it is to be a single lady and being able to use your single status as a bonus to glorifying God.
1) When we are single we get to serve God with no other distractions. When you are dating, married and/or have a family your focus gets pulled to provide and care for your loved ones. There is nothing wrong with that by any means, but I think it gives us single ladies a chance to be able to serve God without those distractions. We should cherish this time that we get to spend with God and use this time to grow our relationship with Christ. I don’t know about you, but I love this!
2) We can turn our once bitter feelings about this day into a day that we express our love for our friends and family and show people that being single is not something that we should look down upon, but as a time where we can be inspired and show the peace and contentment that God provides us as we wait for our godly husband. Lady in Waiting by Jackie Kendall states “For a single woman to experience genuine contentment while soloing in a couples’ world, she must avoid the ditches of discontentment. She needs to learn the mystery of contentment and its power over the restless torture of desire.”
3) We embrace the time God is giving to find out who we are in Christ and make sure that our hearts are being filled with God and not the expectation of a godly husband. No one can fill that void but God and if we try to fill it with anything of this world we are setting ourselves up for failure. I don’t know about you, but I so love the person I am now that God is in my life and the woman that I have become and I look forward to learning more about myself as time elapses. If I don’t know who I am and make sure that God is my priority then how can I be a good wife to anyone else? I thank God every day for the extra time He is giving me to learn this.
4) And finally….we also don’t have to worry about answering to anyone but God of course and ourselves. We get to pick up and do what we want, make our own schedules, sleep in on the weekends, and let the dishes pile up if we want to. Extra bonus points!!
I could go on and on with different bullet points, but the bottom line is I am content with who I am in Christ and being single. In fact, I love being single! Are there some lonely times? Yes, but I know who to turn to when I start to get those feelings. So as your friends and family are going about their romantic day with their spouses/boyfriends get inspired by their joy and use it to have a date night with God. I know I am. I have my pajamas all laid out, but instead of a pint of ice cream to drown my sorrows away, I am going to have my bible and a pen and paper and have some quiet time and really feel the joy and love this Valentine’s Day from my Heavenly Father.
Where are you today? Do you have some bitterness and discontentment that needs to be worked out or are you happy and content in God’s plan for you to be single at this time?
Lady in Waiting
(Jackie Kendall & Debby Jones)
Is not about finding the right man,
But becoming the right woman.
The Lady in Waiting
recklessly abandons herself
to the Lordship of Christ,
diligently uses her single days,
trusts God with unwavering faith,
demonstrates virtue in daily life,
loves God with undistracted devotion,
stands for physical and emotional purity,
lives in security,
responds to life in contentment,
makes choices based on her convictions,
and waits patiently for God to meet her needs.